Heading: Claire-Louise Ferris Memorial Trust
I Believe




Claire was affectionately known as "Claire-bear". She came out with some wonderful sayings that made everyone laugh...and we called 'bearisms' .....here are a selection of them....enjoy!

Why is he called Bruce False Eye? His eyes look normal to me – Bruce Forsyth

Was the Cold War fought in the winter?

Who’s Paul McCartney? He’s one of the Beatles – Who are they? Oh I know him he’s only famous because his wife made vegetarian food.

Why does she use such dark stage make-up? – Shirley Bassey

Look at all those Jewish people at the Pope’s funeral – They’re not Jewish they’re Catholics – the Pope is head of the Catholic Church. Then why are they all wearing those skull caps.

At Prince Charles’ wedding - Parker’s a funny middle name for a woman –About Camilla Parker-Bowles.

How comes the Queen knows all the words of the service without looking at her book. She’s head of the Church of England – Is she?

At Junior school talking about the Bible “Who can tell me what a Prophet is?” Claire’s answer – I know, that’s when you make lots of money.

Claire in boat

After going out with two boys – Matthew and Mark we said her next 2 should be Luke and John. I know them aren’t they the Dispostles? Not sure if she meant Disciples or Apostles.

When talking about saying Grace at mealtimes – Who is this person called Grace then? I don’t remember her in the Bible so why do we thank her at mealtimes?

When visiting friends in a Victorian style house – “I don’t like their house, dead people live there” – Did she mean it was haunted?

When asked at work to find some Plant Hire companies she wondered why they needed any more plants in the office.

I Believe I Can
Home | Dance | I Believe | Bearisms | Charity | Events | Contact